


OiSuga Week - Fools

by Heartythrills



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M, Oisuga Week
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-20
Updated: 2018-08-27
Packaged: 2019-06-30 08:21:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15747906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Heartythrills/pseuds/Heartythrills
Summary: For OiSuga WeekOne train stop and two blocks away from Karasuno High School, Sugawara Koushi strips off his black school uniform to put on his gray uniform for work. Under the protection of that uniform that bonds all other members of the gray, he lets his heart fall for Oikawa Tooru. But everything ended before anything even started.





	1. Falling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Suga started working part-time after school with Oikawa.

One train stop and two blocks away from Karasuno High School, Sugawara Koushi strips off his black school uniform to put on his gray uniform for work. Under the protection of that uniform that bonds all other members of the gray, he lets heart fall for Oikawa Tooru.

“Suga-chan, can you help?” Oikawa asks, gesturing him over as the taller man rolls a cart of boxes to stock the aisles. He is friendly here at work, charming without the Aoba Johsai rivalry. Suga understands this is how it feels to be on the same team as Oikawa.

“I’ll do this section,” Suga offers, stocking the beverage section while Oikawa stocks the chips section. Their shifts start at the same time due to school so they always end up working together.

When Suga first started working, there was a lot of tension between them. Neither was able to set aside their rivalry, their envy, jealousy. But they kept getting forced to work together. There were things that Oikawa could do that Suga couldn’t, or vice versa.

One particularly rough night handling the front, Suga went to the storage room for his break to gather himself together. As he was trying to blink away the tears, appease the frustrations, the door swung open and Oikawa tumbled in. Suga had thought that the taller man was eavesdropping on him and came to laugh at him. But that wasn’t the case at all. Oikawa’s knee was giving out on him that night. It was painful to watch the color fade from his face as the pain overtook him. He grimaced, eyebrows threaded in regret when he caught Suga’s eyes before he fell to the floor. Suga rushed to him, ready to call for help. Oikawa didn’t let him. He pulled Suga to him, hands crushing his wrist as he whispered into Suga’s ears, “Please get my medication.” His voice was hoarse, unlike the usual velvet croon. That wasn’t how Oikawa’s supposed to be. He wasn’t supposed to be in pain like this. How was he supposed to continue playing volleyball in university? How was Suga ever going to beat him at his best?

“Why are you crying?” Oikawa asked after his pain had subsided from the medication. Honestly, Suga also didn’t know why, maybe because he was just having a really rough day. The tears kept flowing and his whole body was trembling as the taller man wrapped his arms around him. The warmth and contact eventually calmed him and they say wordlessly in the comfort of one another until break was over.

Suga accompanied Oikawa home that night. They didn’t really talk, but the tension wasn’t there either. They made a few comments every now and then about members of the team, nothing much.

They haven’t talked about that night since it happened, but there really isn’t anything to talk about. Oikawa’s medical condition is none of Suga’s business.

“Sorry.”

Oikawa’s voice pulls Suga back to present time. The taller man is reaching for a bottle on the shelf above Suga. The heat enveloping him makes his ears burn. It’s been doing so lately.

“Do you want to grab dinner after work together?” Oikawa asks when he got the bottle and steps away. “It’s payday, so I’ll treat.”

Oikawa’s charming wink is all Suga sees before the word ‘yes’ instinctively escapes his mouth.

They’ve grabbed snacks on the way home together, but sitting down for dinner, this is a first. They’ve been on good terms for over a month now. Graduation is upon them.

“How’s this place?” Oikawa asks, leaning closely to Suga to show him a restaurant on his phone. “They have a good variety and it doesn’t seem to be too packed.” All Suga can really pay attention to is how close Oikawa is to him so he nods.

The restaurant is dimly lit and has a nice volume of chatter. The waiter takes them to a booth and gives them the menu.

“The karaage looks good,” Oikawa comments. “Are you getting a set?”

Suga looks at the menu and settles on the special bento set. “Can you handle spice?”

Oikawa shrugs. “We’ll see.” When the food came, they taste each other’s set. Oikawa can’t handle spice. His whole face burns up after a small bite.

They talk about nothing, like the customers today, or what happened at school or on TV. Warm up talk until graduation becomes the topic.

“My graduation’s tomorrow,” Oikawa says. “When’s yours?”

“Next week,” Suga responds. “Time flies, doesn’t it?”

Oikawa gives a solemn nod. “Which school are you going to?”

“University A in Miyagi.” Suga finishes his tea and looks at the taller man. “You’re going to Tokyo, right?”

Another nod. He doesn’t seem too enthusiastic about it. “Yeah.”

“It’s a place for talents like you,” Suga assures. “You’ll make it big. I’m cheering you on.”

Oikawa chuckles and gets up to go pay. They stop by a taiyaki stand on the way to the train station and Suga buys two for them.

“Thanks for dinner,” Suga smiles as he hands one to Oikawa.

The night is crisp as they walk in silence. Suga glances at Oikawa, who is looking up at the clear sky. The stars are in plain sight. He wonders what’s on Oikawa’s mind.

“Do you believe in fate?” the taller man asks without looking away from the stars.

“I don’t know,” Suga responds. “I don’t really think about it.”

Oikawa lets out a soft hum as they continue walking. They don’t talk for the rest of the way to the train station. They take the same train home, but Oikawa’s stop is after Suga’s. So Suga is confused when Oikawa hops out of the train with him.

“Your stop is the next one, why’d you get off?” Suga asks, slightly concerned.

“I thought I’d walk you home.”

“Are you okay?”

“I’ll be,” Oikawa grins. “I’ll be.”

“Is your knee hurting?” Suga asks, noticing the slowness in Oikawa’s pace. “Do you want to rest?”

Oikawa shakes his head and wraps his arm around Suga’s shoulder. “I’m fine,” he laughs playfully. His hold is gentle on Suga. It’s not the kind that needs support, but the kind that seeks contact so he lets the taller man hold him.

When they get to Suga’s place, Oikawa releases him. He points to the sky and smiles. “Do you believe in shooting stars?”

“As in granting wishes?” Suga chuckles. “I guess I do make wishes…” he looks up at the sky and shrugs. “I don’t expect them to come true though.” He glances at Oikawa, who’s looking right at him. “Do you?”

Oikawa smiles wordlessly. His eyes are warm as he gazes into Suga’s. Their eyes don’t meet often when they work together, but Suga knows why. They’re similar. If they so much as let the other gaze so deeply into them, they’d see past all the walls they built around to protect themselves. Suga is the first to close his eyes, not to shield himself from the intimacy, but to invite it.

It’s a gentle kiss. Shy. Between the soft presses of lips, they shared a single breath under the stars before parting.

“There was a shooting star,” Suga says with a smile when he opened his eyes. Oikawa is smiling at him.

“Did you make a wish?”

“I did,” Suga answers and bites his bottom lip. “Did you?”

Oikawa nods and leans for another kiss. This time, one arm wraps around Suga’s waist closely as his other hand cups his neck. The taller man’s touch is so gentle, kisses so tender, it is painful to bear the message of it all. Maybe this is why Oikawa believes in fate. It’s a mechanism to bear with the pain of the present, fooling one’s heart for a hopeful future.

“When do you leave?” Suga asks when their lips part.

“Next week.”

Suga wants to ask why Oikawa even kissed him, but nothing comes out of his mouth. Those words cling to the tears streaming down his cheeks with Oikawa’s apologies. _I’m sorry. Sorry. Sorry._

But it’s ok. _It’s ok. It’s all ok._ Suga pulls Oikawa down for another kiss. A savoring kiss that whispers a thousand wishes. For success, for recovery, for happiness. He digs his nails into Oikawa’s chest, a single selfish plea, wishing that that heart will still belong to him when they see each other again.

_Thank you. Good bye._


	2. Waiting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's been 3 years since Suga saw Oikawa.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For OiSuga Week 8.2018 Prompt: Clinic, Nightmare, and Free Prompt
> 
> This is heavily inspired by Bokura ga Ita because I always wanted to write a fanfic with OiSuga following a similar storyline.

One block and two stores away from his apartment, Sugawara Koushi sits in a cold, sanitized room in the clinic. He hasn’t been feeling well. He’s lucky he even made it here without collapsing. The last time he visited a clinic was early March three years ago, picking up medication with Oikawa Tooru. They were supposed to be celebrating their reunion after not being able to meet up for nearly 2 years since high school graduation. A single night was all Suga asked for so he could hate the man, so he could love the man, and above all else, so that he could let the man go. But the night was unforgiving—a blinding curtain of callous stars weaved together by Fate to cast its light on the relentless pain that clawed its way between them. The uninvited presence that ambushed Oikawa dragged him as close to hell as it could. His body collapsed to the floor, hands gripping on his knee where Pain had its clutch on him. Oikawa was taken away and disappeared without a trace.

Suga doesn’t send him texts anymore. Oikawa never responded in the first place. 999 texts, one per night until he lost his mind. Texting, calling, crying, screaming at a voicemail that was full. It took a broken phone for Suga to listen to Asahi and Daichi to stop. To just stop thinking, missing, loving. So he channeled those emotions into volleyball, the sports that connected him and Oikawa, the sports that now has to train him to cope with this kind of loss, this utter defeat of a one sided game. 

Suga also stopped hallucinating about Oikawa in the gym. The first few weeks during Suga’s practices, he’d hear the familiar loud slam of Oikawa’s service ace, and without notice, time would collapse. The memories of Oikawa would flood through and he’d be right there behind the net, grinning. Suga would play against this man over and over and over again until his knees gave out, trying to win so he could ask why Oikawa hasn’t returned to him yet. Ask where Oikawa was. Ask if Oikawa still thought of him. 

Suga hasn’t loved enough to hate Oikawa. He hasn’t hate enough to let Oikawa go. He just learned that life has a cruel sense of humor, twisting his whispers to the stars so that what he wants will be granted in the worst way possible. Until the universe deems their meeting appropriate, they will never cross paths. Still, Suga wants to push his luck as high as possible, doing all the legwork until everything falls into place. The pieces may have already started connecting when he relocated in Tokyo for his new job. 

“You haven’t been hydrating yourself,” the doctor’s voice pulls Suga back into the clinic. His mind drifts more and more with the cold he’s having.

“I live alone so it’s a bit hard,” Suga explains. “I’m hoping some medication will help.”

The doctor signs off on a prescription for Suga to pick up at the pharmacy next door, reminding him to keep hydrated and warm in the cold November weather, especially with the constant drizzling and rainfall. He stops by the pharmacy before dropping by the convenient store for a light snack and water bottles. As he eats in the dining section, Suga watches the raindrops splatter on the concrete outside. It’ll be tough to go home in this rain. He can wait until the rain subsides or buy an umbrella. He pulls out his phone to check the weather, noticing a text from Akaashi.

_Are you feeling better? Bokuto and I just dropped by, but you weren’t there so I left the onigiris hanging on your door._

Suga responds, _just went to the doctor’s. Snacking at the conbini nearby._

Akaashi texts back immediately. _We’re heading there too._

Before Suga can respond, his eye catches something, someone. Even with the rain, Suga knows the body belongs to Oikawa. His hands tremble and he fumbles to gather his things. Oikawa’s voice disappears into a thunder roll, and Suga drops everything to run out the store.

“Oikawa!” Suga screams into the street, searching for the familiar body through every window of the stores and offices toward the clinic until his body gives up. He kneels on the floor crying Oikawa’s name over and over again. 

“Suga?” Suga looks up to see Bokuto before he is lifted up into his arms. “Hey ‘Kaashi, I found him,” Bokuto tells Akaashi over the phone. “Can you call the taxi?”

How Suga made it home is a blur to him as he keeps falling in and out of sleep, hearing only Akaashi and Bokuto’s voice every once in a while. His body is burning, his heart is aching, and his head is hammering.

“Suga-chan.”

Suga opens his eyes and sees Oikawa. He still looks as he did when he left for Tokyo. Suga reaches for his hand.

“Oikawa, I missed you.”

“Why?”

 _Why?_ Suga thinks. “Because I love you.”

“You love me?” Oikawa’s head tilts in confusion. “I didn’t know that.”

“Didn’t…didn’t I ever tell you?” Suga thinks about it and realizes he’s never told Oikawa.

Oikawa pushes Suga away and collapse to the floor, holding his knee in pain.

 

It’s happening again.

 

It’s happening again.

 

It’s happening again.

 

Suga screams.

“There, there. You’re fine,” Akaashi croons. 

Suga is in Akaashi’s arms, clutching tightly to his back. His body is trembling against the younger man’s warmth. After a few minutes, he calms down and pulls away from Akaashi. They are in Suga’s bedroom. He can hear Bokuto in the kitchen. 

Everything about Oikawa was a dream. Just another nightmare he hasn’t had for a while. So he cries. He misses Oikawa.

“Kuroo-san saw Oikawa last night,” Akaashi says, grabbing the attention of Suga. “He went to the pharmacy for medication.” Suga sits up, gathering himself as the younger man opens his mouth to continue. “Tsukishima-kun interns at the clinic and it seems Oikawa will be going to there tomorrow for a check up.” Akaashi flicks Suga’s forehead and forces him back on the bed. “But you’re not going anywhere until you get better.”

“Don’t even try to resist,” Bokuto beams from the door, holding a bowl of porridge. “He’ll strap you down. He has the tools.” He winks and hands him the bowl. Akaashi’s grin is enough to halt any of Suga’s impulses.

Suga’s temperature has dropped significantly by nighttime. Akaashi says that he’ll drop by in the morning to check up on Suga on his way to work and leaves with Bokuto. After they leave, Suga takes out his phone. He texts that number that never responded back.

_Entry #1000 Wait for me._

Suga sits nervously at a bench in the lobby of the clinic. There are only a few people this early in the morning. He waits until he starts to fall asleep under the spell of his cold. He slaps his cheeks to wake himself and stands up.

“Oh, sorry,” Suga apologizes when he bumps into someone walking by. He looks up.

Glazed almond eyes, chestnut hair, and a split second of regret when Suga recognizes the man before him. Oikawa couldn’t have been breathing when their eyes met. But continues walking, a forced smile inching up his face, as he gets closer to Suga. There is a pronounced limp in his walk that wasn’t there before, and each step cripples Suga’s heart to a level that no therapy can cure.

They stand gazing at each other silently, taking in the sight they’ve each longed for the past few years. Suga can feel the tears building up, but it is Oikawa who speaks first.

“How’s it going, Suga-chan?”

Suga isn’t sure if he’s laughing or crying when responds, “It’s going…?”

 _Ah_ , he’s crying because Oikawa’s hand is caressing his cheek, wiping the tears of the warmth he’s been longing for. Before he can hold Oikawa’s hand, their contact breaks and Oikawa steps away, gesturing for Suga to follow him elsewhere.

Suga follows Oikawa to the back of the building where there are a few empty benches. They sit in silence next to each other, staring blankly at the trees in front of them.

“You know…” Suga starts, “I just recently moved here to Tokyo.” Oikawa doesn’t turn to look at Suga. “It’s for work. I wasn’t sure if I’d get the job,” Suga laughs nervously.

“Congratulations,” Oikawa smiles. It isn’t so forced as before but it isn’t full there either. 

“How’s…everything for you?” Suga watches Oikawa stiffen without saying anything. Something in his heart sinks and an unsettling feeling takes over his body. “Oikawa, can I see your face?” He doesn’t resist when Suga turns his face around. “What happened?”

“Nothing…” Oikawa shrugs. “Nothing really.”

“Oikawa…” Suga caresses his face. “You know you can tell me anything right?” 

Oikawa shakes his head softly.

“Why?” Suga’s voice quivers. “Why?”

The taller man takes Suga’s hand from his face and places it back on Suga’s lap. “Because it’s hard.”

“I can take it.” Suga’s hands tighten into fists on his lap. “I can take it, you can tell me.” The tears are coming back to his eyes as he whispers, “I just want to help because I love you so much.”

Oikawa brushed Suga’s hair from his forehead. “You can’t love me…” He kisses Suga’s forehead lightly as broken utterings of ‘why’ escapes Suga’s mouth. Their eyes meet. For the first time Suga sees the sadness in Oikawa’s eyes. “What do you really know about me?” It wasn’t a question. Even if it was, Suga couldn’t answer. He knows nothing. 

Oikawa waits until Suga’s cry subsides and stands up. “I have to go.”

Suga reaches for his hand. “Tell me one thing...” he sobs. “Did you ever think of me?” 

Oikawa doesn’t answer. He gazes at Suga longingly with a broken smile, as though he can’t bring himself to respond. The silence strings on like giant beads on the delicate conversation, breaking when Oikawa turns away.

Suga wants to ask why Oikawa didn’t respond to his calls after the incident. Wants to ask why he never came to visit. Wants to ask so so many things. The only thing that comes out from his mouth is a sob. An ugly sob that took all his words as Oikawa walks away. He lets the strangled emotions that he has buried deep in his heart ooze out of his mouth to grieve defiantly into the walls of this clinic.

Suga didn’t even know the man. How arrogant of him to believe that he could’ve done anything at all when he didn’t even know him. How arrogant of him to believe that their love was mutual. How arrogant of him to believe whatever they had was love at all.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more chapter!


End file.
